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Transformers became obligatory assets in people’s lives. Multiple reforms devised by Optimus Prime resulted in the development of an alien cramped world. Optimus is responsible for the introduction of outer space organisms called Transformers. The introduction distinguished through his first war with the opposing Decepticon resulted in the redevelopment of Transformers on Earth. He used Transformers as an asylum for the Earths fate. Therefore, humans began to doubt their own propaganda. The world congregated toward the redevelopment at the price of overpopulation and food demands exceeding beyond a famine. As a result global markets lacked supply therefore demand met its own needs. Many of us initially believed our lives were at risk because of the battling opposition, the Decepticon. However, the world thought wrong because the Decepticon were used as a decoy to influence Humans that the world was at end. Optimus migrated to Earth with his own hoax he used for years until our Earth was beyond its apocalypse age. Optimus lied about the truth behind why he was present.
Transformers became obligatory assets in people’s lives. Multiple reforms devised by Optimus Prime resulted in the development of an alien cramped world. Optimus is responsible for the introduction of outer space organisms called Transformers. The introduction distinguished through his first war with the opposing Decepticon resulted in the redevelopment of Transformers on Earth. He used Transformers as an asylum for the Earths fate. Therefore, humans began to doubt their own propaganda. The world congregated toward the redevelopment at the price of overpopulation and food demands exceeding beyond a famine. As a result global markets lacked supply therefore demand met its own needs. Many of us initially believed our lives were at risk because of the battling opposition, the Decepticon. However, the world thought wrong because the Decepticon were used as a decoy to influence Humans that the world was at end. Optimus migrated to Earth with his own hoax he used for years until our Earth was beyond its apocalypse age. Optimus lied about the truth behind why he was present.
In 2007 when Optimus first appeared, the world witnessed the defeat of
Megatron, leader of the Decepticon. Afterwards, the Humans and their diligence found
the opportunity to use the aliens. However, without concern, they were unaware
Optimus was playing a game of monopoly on Earth. The Megatron defeat resulted in
the development of NEST. A fail government program aimed at global defense
through the interaction of Transformers led by Optimus. NEST put Optimus in
a position where he could lead everyone to believe the world was at risk
of a foreign invasion, the Decepticon. Many of us believed he was actually
here to defend our world, especially with how NEST portrayed his image. This was all wrong. Optimus had his own approach for Humans.
He had learnt our languages and ethics through the World Wide Web before he
arrived. This fundamental understanding of our ethics was used to globally
influence everyone with a capitalist approach. He claimed, that if the world
did not capitalize for Transformer development, the Earth would be destroyed
from the Decepticon. The successful approach had everyone focused on the
benefits from Transformers in our world. Therefore, instead of investing into property and shares, Transformers became obligatory assets in people’s lives. People spent billions in pursuit for the best
Transformers to defend against Decepticon decoys designed by Optimus.
Transformers have since dominated our world. I grew up with this disaster. My name is Sam Witwicky and I was only 17 when Optimus first came to Earth with the other Transformers. Among the many, one became my caretaker. His name was Bumblebee. He first appeared when I bought my first car. Throughout the series of wars with the Decepticon he saved my life several times. I felt honoured and privileged because I was one of the first they contacted. For years Bumblebee and I built a successful relationship until Optimus ruined everything. Even though he is obviously an alien robot and cannot resemble human qualities, we spent years together. However, he has no memory of our past because Optimus destroyed it. Optimus has the ability to restore the nucleus within his Transformers brains. Therefore, he deleted the memory of Bumblebee. I lost my robot and first car. Although it may have been a mistake to interact with the aliens, the times I spent with Bumblebee are inevitable. Optimus has since preponderated our biggest nations, America, China, Europe, Russia and more. The world is ravished. I live in the Australian outback in a bunker that lays 30ft below ground. My life may have been a thrill but these days I spend most of my time regretting I had met that Transformer in the eye.
Word count: 817
Hey Chance
ReplyDeleteA very interesting twist where Optimus is "somewhat" the bad guy in your story. It's a refreshing idea that could allow room for more imagination.
The ending is very sudden leaving me hanging with questions such as who the narrator was. It's almost as if the ending of your story is the beginning of a new chapter (if you know what I mean)
Otherwise, well written and a good twist to a character most of us have heard off.
Hey Leonella,
DeleteYeah I agree, my ending is a bit vague, I am trying to write in the perspective of Sam Witwicky. The main young dude from the first Transformers movie released in 2007. I should probably state his name somewhere in that last paragraph so unfamiliar readers with the topic will have an idea. My writing still lacks so much though, i tend to get too descriptive and off point.
Awesome feedback though, much appreciated. I will try to revise it.
Cheers.
Hey Chance
ReplyDeleteAlthough it's a vague ending, in my perspective, it looks like the ending of this story and could be the beginning/introduction to a new story/chapter.
Your writing is great, I understand that a story of 800-1000 words isn't enough to put all your ideas across but the main point is there: Optimus is the bad guy who conquered the world.
Good luck with the revision
Hey Chance, great read. I'm not a huge follower of the Transformers franchise but I found this to be a smooth read.
ReplyDeleteI found your links really helpful and think this is an excellent way to inform people who are new to a story of certain key details which link to your story.
I found the ending came and ended rather abruptly, but I guess that was because you found that you were quickly running out of words.
Hey Chance :)
ReplyDeleteYou write very concisely and logically! I think the certain controlled and strictness(?) of your writing style is really suitable for genre (Sci-Fi) such as the Transformers. Reading your story reminded me a lot of the Terminator series as well. Its fitting that you've put in a general introductory history of the Transformers as most of us have seen the recent films but aren't familiar with it in depth. Your knowledge of the series is apparent with all the characters, terminology, history etc and as a work of fan-fiction,it fits in well with the whole cannon.
I was quite confused at the start of the story, I didn't know whether it was a narrative from a character or a third person point of view. Like the film, you introduced the narrators voice as the character near the end of the story- I remember in the end of Transformers Shia LeBouf does a voice over, very similar to that in your story, to conclude the film.
Overall it was an interesting read, I liked your tone especially and I can't wait to read some of your critical writing for the second and third assignment :)